unemplyed and a little uninspired.

why, oh, why must the job market be SO suckish? i need to fund my eating habbit or learn to cook, like, yesterday. i want some new panties because i've been accidentally going commando due to me NOT doing laundry. i have to pay for school, necessities, blah, blah, blah. bitch, bitch, bitch!

i hate being an adult.

everything else is swell. i have a new LG Vu. my nails are hot pink. the weather is delicious. my boyfriend's brother is opening up his new night spot tomorrow night [if you're from my hometown, head out there for Jesse Robinson's Annual Birthday Bash]. "No Black, No White, Just Blues!" i'm gonna be there, wearing bells, or just taking pictures.

i need to catch up with reading and commenting. give me some time. give me some Tylenol.

ciao.

i've got fans and i'm a bitch [fixed and reposted]

okay! i've fixed the email form! go ahead and resubmit. same post, just spiffied up:

1. 4 return visits. 


2. i've got the IP addy
   


3. i can even kind of tell what area of town she stays in. 


4. referring link is that of one of my blogger friends. 


5. and this is NOT the first time that she's been so smart; look at my "advice" to her.
   

i feel really lame for being the target of a mindless internet grudge and i hate having to feel upset and angry! but some folks are just ape-shit crazy and don't know how to move on.

she's pregnant by my undeserving and sloppy leftovers, emailed me admitting to a sad and self-conscious struggle with trying to be "better" than me [poor girl, it will NEVER happen that way], and borrows folks' blogger friends, just like a mature mother, to fill her void of a life? looks like someone not only doesn't have a life but is trying to be a second-rate copy and live mine. it's a sad, sad thing when folks living in their own alternate realities can't see the truth, but it's entirely flattering! thank you, ladies and gentlemen.. i am thankful for every schizo fan..

i'm honestly never a bitch unless it is absolutely necessary. i'm tired of feeling like i'm throwing a mangy, stray cat away just for the thing to return because i fed it once! so to stop the feeding...

TP & PP is going "friends only" like my old LiveJournal days. here's to more candid posts and protecting your email addresses [and my ass] if you're interested! here's to me moving on and away again. here's to the world continuing to turn.

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the f-word and jokes!

i got pissed because my appointment just called me "sweetheart" at my job. silly boy. here are some rude jokes to make me laugh and feel better. not really feminist, just mean!

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: "I can do better than this" and he made woman.

"Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe."
-Jackie Mason 

Q: Why are all dumb blond jokes one liners?
A: So men can understand them.

Q: Why do men like BMWs?
A: They can spell it.

Q: Why do men name their penises?
A: Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 99% of their decisions.

Q: Why are men like noodles?
A: They are always in hot water . They lack taste. They need dough.  

alright. i feel better now. and i agree that these are mean! i don't really think like this [except for maybe the first one...]. honestly, if that guy knew me, "sweetheart" would be the last thing he thought about me! i'm a woman, but i'm only a "lady" when i can afford to be one. i'm strong. i'm a tart--a cherry tart.

bummy-ex update.

more for my own records than anything. no comments. after larry called, my father, uncles, boyfriend, brothers, guy friends, etc. would have LOVED to have the number that he called from to politely [yeah right] tell my destitute and sad ex that he had better NEVER pull that again--if he has an ounce of concern for himself.

well one of the above persons tried to. the number was disconnected. what a punk move! larry called me right before he knew he couldn't be reached back because he didn't want to deal with reality and consequences. explains why he said "aww!" right before the phone hung up. i knew that he was immature/a bitch/generally an inept man when we were dating. what a lovely man to have around. just not around me.

i hope that he never contacts me again. it's been a good, long time since i've had to even remember that he really existed.

i've cut out the cancer a long time ago. with him. with "friends" who don't understand the concept of being loyal or genuine. with enemies. i pray for and smile at all of my debtors, especially the ones who can't take the hint that they're not supposed to be in my life anymore. it's been doing me good so far!

everyone have a fabulous Friday! be brave and genuine. smile a lot. love the place where you are currently and don't waver--especially if it's rewarding you!

marital rape is legal

assuming the worst, that is. i almost threw up when i read this article from the Bust magazine website. apparently, a married woman can't refuse sex from her husband if this bill is passed. how disgusting. if that country doesn't want the world to think that it's full of monkeys, then a bad job is being done of it. i could spit in the supporters' eyes. don't fuck with me and women's rights.

on a lighter note:

TGIF!!! i need a break! i've been pissing blood thanks to a sanitation issue, but i'm better. i drove an hour away to be with my manfriend for the weekend while he was performing. credit card statements will go back to my house stating "EconoLodge." how classy. i literally walked up onto a celebrity downtown there: i noticed some old guys flirting with me, so i asked them for a light for my Andy's cigar since they were talking to me. turns out, one of them is C. L. Blast [and here]. he introduced himself and showed me a picture of himself with Isaac Hayes from way back when they used to perform together. then i asked him to sign my program. it was great. he had forgotten what year it was and it was so cute.

after we left the hotel together, one of Andy's teachers said to him "I know that you're gonna play good today!" the jazz performances were great. yes, Andy does it all. him and his university sounded divine and jazz isn't even my cup of tea.

i need another break soon. i miss singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" with Andy in the van. i miss kicking someone in my sleep. i don't miss nearly killing everyone on I-20 on my drive there and back for that weekend.

tried to pull the pregnancy joke on my mom for April 1st. she cursed me the fuck out and and told me to buy a test to make sure. then she said that she was coming after me with a clothes hanger. shit. she got the joke and started laughing and apologized for calling me a skank-ass whore. she was SO angry! it was funny how Andy went from being her "favorite son-in-law" to "that sorry motherfucker" in two seconds. Daddy laughed and said that he would choke the shit out of him until he turned purple--and marriage? no one is taking his daughter unless they're employed, have a house, two cars, and are damned near running for Congress first!

oh boy.


me and C.L. Blast and his signature both taken with my Pantech C150.

some feminism.

entertain me if you're brave enough.

1. why don't more men take their wives' last name when they marry? why do so many people find it necessary to take the other person's last name anyway? i'm almost certain that i'll keep mine. maybe.
2. why is a woman's issue, such as fertility control facing such a reduction of rights at the legislation of men? they don't even have ovaries, but they can tell me what to do with my body. i call bullshit. as special as our bodies are, we should have special allowances. we shouldn't be punished for being great! c'mon Constitution! women are people too! ladies, "We shall overcome!"
   
3. WalMart won't sell PlanB. thanks guys!
   
4. there is a huge birth control price hike going on. this is counterproductive.
   
5. lots [way too many] states have unconstitutional holds on abortion access. many of the state legislators are men. i wish dumb folks like the governor from my home state could temporarily be disenfranchised when it comes to things like this. his backwater, redneck, tobacco dipping ass.. men like him make me want to cry.
6. sex toys can't be sold in my home state?!! as extremely hard as it is for a lady to reach orgasm through sex, now she can't even get pleasure from herself? but strip clubs are okay. and crimes like sexual harassment, domestic violence, and rape aren't punished harshly enough if you ask me. women have become the prisoners and slaves of their own society.
   
7. men have a defunct genome, but they're superior enough to rule over themselves and women since when? seriously guys: be sensitive to a woman's issue or don't vote. go jump off of a bridge. all in favor of a female monarch after Obama finishes being sexy in office say "Aye!"
   
8. Dead Men Don't Rape. men=monsters. sounds very radical and hateful. they aren't my exact sentiment. BUT they have some disgusting basis. sad to admit it. how many men do you know carry pepper spray with them at night?
   
9. wait a minute. you want me to to get a chemical burn to make sure that my legs are hairless. you want me to wear bras, impractical little heels, and face paint [because i don't look good enough]. i have to suck in my stomach, douche my vagina full of poison because you can't handle the way a real woman smells, cover up my body because you can't keep your eyes in your head... sounds like the other sex has a bit more of a problem with ladies do than we do with ourselves. almost sounds like society hates us. it's their problem. they should date men. or fuck dolls. when did feminine become synonymous to impractical? why oh why?
10. my period doesn't make me unclean or scary. it's the most beautiful thing that my body can do. i don't need to douse myself in perfume and limit my activity because the world is afraid of the wonderful thing that my body does. i am the instrument of Creation [only when i choose to be]!
11. i'm lesbian because i'm making sense to you? where is your logic, dude?! actually i might go lesbian because idiots like you make me actually want to date another being as out-of-it's-mind as me. hell, we can share shoes.
12. stop saying "chicks, cougars, creatures, sweetheart, cunts, etc" stop naming your instruments and cars after women. stop naming hurricanes and tropical storms and such women's names. stop it right now.
    

------------------------------
Go do this now
i know i'm pretty radical. it's my job, or nearly is. i can't wait to be the greatest gynecologist, most vocal woman's rights activist, president of my state's chapter of NOW, author of several books, etc.. but you don't have to be. leave the hard stuff up to the professionals! here is what you can do:

1. go to Planned Parenthood website and see what you can do to support progress in your area. don't have a facility in your state? there's your need for progress right there!
2. go to the NARAL website and see how woman friendly your state rates up. it can't be any more disgusting than my own.. my History teacher gave me that website in high school after i emailed out a petition against the governor's action and mailed him a letter! i love ladies with sense! so cool! i still got a C in her class...
3. go to the NOW website. i love them and they're always looking for support AND they'll mail you some really sweet stickers for your car!
4. go watch the Vagina Monologues. seriously!
5. Rihanna [or however you spell this misguided girl's name] is crazy. this website is not.
6. go to Bust.com! have fun!
   
7. dress as Wonder Woman or Poison Ivy! they're hot ladies, they're strong, and they don't let a man tell them what to do! who would dare?!
   

--------------------------------------------
i am NOT a man-hating [or Republican-hating], natural-smelling, bitter, cat owning, PMSing, boot-wearing lesbian person. sorry if i seemed so. don't let me scare you off. i actually love men. i generally want to put things up their asses for my pleasure. many men are wonderful. my brothers, my uncles, my boyfriend and his dad and brothers are all beautiful men. men do so much for me, for this country. they are heroes at war. they are protectors, they are single parents. they are amazing lovers. they can be the most polite gentlemen and some of the most intelligent people i'll ever know, unless they happen to be the governor of a very damned, very Red, very backwards state. some of the raddest feminists are men and i thank them for their support. i do not believe that women are superior [even if we are pretty rad]. i support equal relations and respect among all human beings, no matter what gender or sex that they identify with. if you want to take issue with something i've posted, go ahead. it's healthy and i might have been a bit violent and obsessive. i just want everyone to recognize how amazing ladies are! i'll admit it--i'm not perfect! only very nearly so.

and then, of course, my Libra senses tell me to equally rant against the stupid, useless, disgusting women blighting the face of the earth. but that is another post that i will have just as much fun with.


YUCK, right?! thx, here.

things i fucking hate thursday!

it's Thursday and i should be busy loving things, but i have a stronger urge to wax on some things that have earned my HATE.

1. attention whores, name-brand bitches, vapid sluts--MANY girls today
   
2. misogynists who disguise themselves behind religion and the absurd belief that such notions are "cool" and are too fucking stupid/disgusting to realize it--AND the women who aren't absolutely enraged by it
   
3. women who play dumb/weak/the victim just because they are women--act like you deserve respect and you might just get some! c'mon, ladies.. we've come a long way, baby!
4. mornings and having to be up early. it's unnatural!
   
5. emulation to the point of suffering an identity complex
6. folks so painfully unaware of their personality disorder[s] that they put others in an equal pain
7. insomnia. heh. maybe i should cry in between Bob's sweating bitch tits that hang enormous the way you think of God's as big..
8. ignorant Southern Baptists giving everyone the "amen enema" while evading some truths [like the two Creation stories and the racists and the sexists] like a clam and actually causing more atheism. good job. really.
9. FX not returning with Rescue Me and Sons of Anarchy soon enough!
10. having dreams in which i know that i'm dreaming and overworking my brain wake myself up unconsciously until it transfers over into a physical sense! weird!
    

i'm done. i'm blaming it on my sinuses. the weather is changing too fast too often and i can't get well. so, what would a similar list of yours have?

resettling with a fever.

it's about time for another photo and i like this one alot!


i'm not dead: i've just been busy with moving into my new place off campus and restarting school. and i have a fever, so i feel like my head is in a hot fog. i'll be around to comment and to spray disinfectant until things settle down a bit more!

things that i have yelled at.

oh, bugger it. this fabulous femme can't keep her cool air all of the time.

Things That I have Yelled at Today [both mentally and quite literally]

8:13 A - upon oversleeping the alarm and looking at my phone. "Fuck! I have orientation at nine!"

10 A - while i look my supervisors in the face with a fake smile and lots of makeup plastered on. When is the soonest I can shower! I need food! My coffee is fucking cold and I'm bloated to Hell!

11:30 A - on the way to class. I speak French; kiss me while I kill my professor today! I'm tired!

12:30 P - leaving class and booking it back to my apartment. "Come the fuck on, you car! I need to get home!"

1:30 P - Fuck world lit.. I can't even read Latin!

3:45 P - in class with the hottest professor ever. I'm starving and I really want to get the hell out of here--right after I look at his butt again!

4:10 P - "Fuck you, Chrome! Why is everything crashing! That's bullshit! I want Facebook now!"

6 P [currently] - I need to calm the fuck down and relax!

---------------------------------------------------

PMS, the heat, bad attitude, immaturity, or what? be careful, or i'll yell at you, too! ♥

reality in the city.

im watching SATC and admiring my long, dark vamp nails the color of oxygen-exposed blood. im siding with Carrie and acknowledging my blank punctuation. i'd love to do some raunchy blogging about something in a way that is full of energy and enjoyment for both me and you. buuuuut, guess who hasn't been having any amount of sex in either my home city or this college city. that's all me.

and it doesn't go to say that it's a bad thing. again, my blank, absent punctuation makes me giggle. i fucking need space to make this emotional phase in a complete and harmless way. can't take any harm right now. but any relocation to any phase doesn't erase whether or not loneliness is there. i guess i could make myself feel not alone, which isn't hard to do. it's all relative and deeply mental, as cliché as it is. no problem. i can do this all day long, everyday like nobody's business. done. but, why does it always seem like there is room for such thoughts and conclusions in my brain if the matter isn't even a true problem? if it isn't a problem, hell it's a state of normalcy for PLENTY of people, am i right? so why does my thought pattern deem my singleness as pressing enough to interrupt other thoughts that make more sense, such as nicotine addiction, the PDR, French idioms i should familiarize myself with, God, MY own divinity?

see? it's an unbalanced equation and i don't know what's doing the unbalancing. i fucking hate women on the race to the altar. i hate women who lose themselves in their husbands for whatever reason. i question taking a man's last name for my own, i hate the confines of sexuality and the whole concept of normalcy when it comes to relationships and how disappointing it is when all of our ideals are shot to hell and all there is to do is keep trudging along. it's too often that women are victims and too seldom that there are real answers or attempts at solutions. there AREN'T any. look at the dissolution of celebrity families even considering all of their money and resources. look at how you deny God and transcend and literally fight the existence. the lines are constantly being blurred; who's to say what is sin or growth? who is to say what is right or wrong or even how to fucking go about doing either?

everyone is full of shit, and what we say and especially what we do is full of shit.

sad and scary. wtf?

i got this in my inbox. it's hilarious and just a tad bit scary. shyeah, there are typos galore and it doesn't even matter:

"come on now I kno U get told all the time how beautiful because its only the truth how do you feel about about me so far? how would you feel the most comfortable confiding with me about eachother I could really enjoy ur friendship an companionship baby I would be that some1 u could grow to trust an maybe one day love thats whats up.. 4 the most part I could see myself holding you on the beach under the moonlight watching firworks b4 we go to the condo an get in the hot tubb or just holding hands as we walk where the water rushes on our feet an buries our toes in the sand if we see a lil sand crab an you become affraid I will carrie you Im being serious with you R U down to get 2kno me an see how I broke the mold you'll never meet any 1 like me again they could not duplicate my style if I sold them the blu print but dont think I am boastful b/cause I NOT but I am confident in myself I kno you could respect my hustle an I bet your a girl who would be down for her man???"

for the record, this is from a a cute white guy. doesn't matter, just illustrating here. how does he know that i respond well to such jargon? in other words, does he think that just because i'm black i'm willing to "respect [his] hustle?" i can only wonder.

also for the record, this is a little scary and hopefully some other girl [of any race] can "be down" for this man because it just isn't me. protect yourselves online. there are some true creepers out there. it's funny and it's sad. i'm SO lol'ing at the sand crab bit.

.

i just left my car blasting a Danzig song--the perfect one, i will add--and i'm so full of thoughts from fresh experiences that i could scream again.

so i've unfortunately come to terms that i don't have a best friend anymore and that i my exes are not my friends over and over again at each painful encounter, intimate or not. and it's embarrassing to feel physically pushed away instead of just rejected. it's embarrassing to have to live such base rejection. it's maddeningly anger-inducing to not ever be on the side that's protecting itself, being selfish, pushing someone away from their car door so that they can leave, saying "Goodbye" in a shitty tone.

and then i'm pissed at her and i'm so fucking angry at him [angry atm e for letting him] that i'm blasting the radio and actually driving the speed limit away and Danzing's "Mother" drills itself in my head..

i don't wanna find Hell with anyone else but myself. he is not my Scarecrow God, and she is no gift. i am [cliché, but absolutely true] my own best thing and i'm the shit. i don't need to hang off of anyone else's power and allure for my own. i possess it already and i should recognize that.

whatever, bitch[es].

im so stupid and am having some sour luck because this is the second time that i'm trying to publish this post. i fucking called him i called larry and some [im assuming] woman picked up. didnt say anything, though. all i heard was larry yell at [perhaps] her, "no!"

offensive, disrespectful, confusing, devastating when i need it least. went to walmart in my leggings not to let the old men who work there stare me down and say, "Jesuss..."

i have a vague coffee date tomorrow.

im so fucking stupid. i fucking called him and some [im assuming] woman picked up. didn't say anything, though. all i heard was larry yell at her, "no!"

offensive, sad, confusing, devastating when i need it least. went to walmart in my leggings and let the old men working there stare at my ass and say "Jesus.."

have a vague coffee date tomorrow.

i could punch that skank-ho in her face.

seriously, yo guys in a Homestarrunner-esque way. this post is going to be long, only because i have more to say than how much i love/hate your mother.

today was the occasion of my little bros' class day ceremony. it was ghetto-fabulous: full of mothers in read weaves, cat calls and hollering, constant camera flash, and vague accomplishments of the maybe graduates along the lines of, "he's active in church and loves his mother!" even "he loves to eat!" my bros were no exception; maybe even the worst of the worst of the day. no matter; they made it! or maybe.. half of the so-called senior class is failing. i wont go and compare it all to MY OWN high school days [ROLL BLUE!], because there is NO comparison and it evades my issue for expressing.

so the massacre of ceremony ends and i run away to find my bros. one is eating cookies from the recessional and fraternizing with his geek friends, the other is surely off flirting with some undeserving, gold-digging whore. my suspicions were confirmed and i found him with the skank-ho.
---------------------------
background about the skank-ho:
-she is set on not dating my brother. when she had a boyfriend, my bro was stupid enough to put his life in danger and see the girl because he loves her. buy her real jewelry, take her out all across town, and find other ways to giver her our money that should be conserved for rent, gas, food, etc. she would of course accept the the attention and never made a move towards breaking up with her then-boyfriend, even if she admitted that he wasn't treating her right! now that she doesn't have a boyfriend, the girl, still uses my brother for his compassion and cash and doesn't commit and make it official. keeps him close enough to hurt him and make him pay for shit. she's a whore and my bro is stupid. i have to watch my little bro deal with this confusion and angst EVERY DAY... who knows how many times he's cried?.. it's a common game and i don't hate a woman for pulling it--just don't do it to MY little bro.
---------------------------
in the mix of other dumbass maybe graduates, she [skank] keeps her distance from me [smart girl] and i realized that when i looked up she was not only holding my cell phone that i had let my bro borrow, but she was actually talking on it!!!! putting her bad skin and makeup on the buttons and doing that annoying thing where you hold the phone and move it from your mouth to your ear constantly when you talk. it was SO not a weekend and i don't know if she was calling an ATT user, or not... i got pissed and yelled to my bro, "i don't want her using my phone! give me my phone back." the girl obviously got the message and froze in a loss for a next move. i didn't have my phone back in the next seconds, so i got between the two, waited for her to complete her call over her shoulder, allowed to bro to take the phone back, and SNATCHED it from his hands.

also, before leaving i let it known that he doesn't need to let his "little friends" use my property because he and they, especially don't pay for it--all while she was standing next to him. and this occurred only after i stared her up and down and gave her a handful of eye rolls. at least i didn't follow my deepest desires and yank her hair around so that her head whips around to my face.. and give her a good, long look in the eyes. "you, bitch.. don't pull this with mine. he's stupid and you stink."

i eventually apologized for embarrassing my brother and making him feel small. i even considered apologizing to the skank to her face.. see the thing is, i know how it felt when laurie, larry's sister, never liked me, disrespected me and larry, and eventually tried to fight me. nevermind what larry didn't do to fix it when i did nothing wrong at first. i just know that it wasn't a good feeling.. even my idiot bro recognized my vice and felt offended that i would treat the lady that he loves like that. hmmmm... and she doesn't even love my brother back! with me and the ex, i was INFATUATED with him. i loved him, wanted to marry him, all of that and look what he did for me. just an example of how i know that my standards aren't crazy. if a dumbass knows right from wrong, how smart is someone who can disagree and then rationalize the bullshit?

i love my brother and i dont appreciate what the skank is doing. i loved larry and his sister just didn't like me because i loved him madly in my own way. but this isn't a post about him or his sister and her bastard baby. this is me and my account of me. this is me, so it's truth.

clicking the Publish button now.

puppy/bitch.

as much as i'd love for my every post here at TPPP to be all vanity and full of nothing but the triumphs in my life, reality doesn't mimic, so i have to type [unfortunately] what resembles a REAL condition. and REALITY isn't all that sparkly and wine-flavored all of the time. .

i know that i joke with the 'rents and with anyone else who will listen about how "grown" i am. "i'm a grown-ass woman..." and all that rot. but right now, i i haven't earned the credit to say so truthfully before now, i have that credit TODAY. mommy is disabled and she allows her body to become increasingly worse. she is more inactive, diabetic, over weight.. and then there is more room for me to step in. all of this superwoman role is going on while in their [my mother and family members'] eyesight, i'm still a puppy. still a puppy who has to do all of the unwanted duties at odd hours in the morning because everyone is sleepy. a puppy who has to find her absolute own way to some health coverage before a current condition will give her systematic syndrome... i've needed insurance for years and if it's my family's wish for me to not be back at Hooters, then they need to provide it! literal years have passed and the issue has been blamed on either parent by each other... and i up and show mommy an application for insurance last night, telling her that i'm handling the situation for myself because i am so concerned and that no one is going to be more concerned than me, thankyouverymuch--she just says... whatever. no matter what my mother's flaws are, i'm not airing them because i still respect her a helluva LOT more than any of you fuckers.

not going into details about how much further adult that i have to be these days. i just want a tiny record of it. don't think that i'm such a baby anymore. or at least, if i must be a baby, i'm one who knows the value of a few much-needed months of health coverage. one who doesn't mind earning her place in life.

on a bit lighter note!
i've made some solid plans to start on my book/novella, whatever it shall become. how exciting is that?! i've been talking to my characters in my dreams and my thoughts more and more often and things are coming together; i don't know what they were waiting for. AND i've found my inyanla vanzant book! i haven't seen it in months!

well, i'm off to my little bros' class day and to the regional office. hopefully to a doctor tomorrow! and, perhaps, the arms of some deserving, handsome man with a degree soon enough?

DAMN, i'm SO tired of hearing "Bleeding Love" in the mornings. gotta watch more alternative music TV.
-ciao.

no words.

okay. this is old:
----------------------

Monday, January 01, 2007

LARRY CAN KISS BETWEEN MY TOES. HIM AND HIS MOMMA. Current mood: devious Category: Life THIS IS FUNNY AS HELL. I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY. DON'T LIKE IT, KISS MY ASS. YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ELSE TO ME. MY BOYFRIEND IS ALREADY GONE. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------According to the McGee's, i am lucifer. i am unsuitable to marry their son. they have their wish. they should go celebrate. Camile [his mother who teaches at Chastain, Chastain folk, you know who i'm talking about], Laurie, and whoever else can all go be elated in their holiness and uprightness, pretentiousness, hypocrisy. it is so funny what happened today. i saw larry on MySpace and messaged him out of habbit; the conversation was casual enough at first. "yeah, i heard that song!" "that's cool!" and then the heavy stuff. i don't know how it happened but we were arguing online. i kept telling larry that he broke up with me and i'm still standing you son-of-a-bitch and no you can't have anything from me! and larry kept incriminating me of bullshit. see my language, McGees? i AM the fucking DEVIL. the guy got me crying and told me that he didn't want me completely out of his life. sounds familliar, huh, amber? i told him that NO, you can't have that from me! none of my heart can be yours! a relatrionship like that causes more drama than necessary, ladies listen to me. he gave me the damned number and i took it like the pathetic little bitch that i was feeling like. that lasted a minute until Mrs. Smith got involved. she told me to get rid of it and tell that little boy to go to hell and kiss the inside of my ass in the bad way. so i texted larry back saying thanks, but no thanks. your cell is not doing me a favor. go on with your life. and where in the hell did this new cell phone come from? the broke bastard cant afford to feed me but he has a new cell phone? he's probably been lying to me and has had it all along... whatever. i deleted his number; i honestly can't remember it. whatever girl is calling him now, have fun, bitch!!!! i call the boy at his house--the only number that i know by heart, by memory, and told him that i was coming over to get my shoes that i left over there. i get there and ring the doorbell and larry is not at the door. Mr McGee answers and asks "who is it?" i say cheniece about 3 times, as if he can't remember the only girl who is dumb enough to put up with his son-in-law. the screen/gate part of the door is still closed and he HANDS ME THE SHOES THROUGHT THE DOOR!!!!! like feeding a goat at the petting zoo!!!! i have four feet now like the bitch that i am! anyway. before i can ask why they have locked me outside, Mr. McGee says that he can't unlock the gate; he can't find his key. then larry's momma says that larry is in the tub, so couldn't come in.... WHICH DAMNED EXCUSE DO YOU WANT TO USE???? whatever, i don't want holy water to burn my skin anyways. why didn't larry come to the door? i want him to see me standing. I'M STILL STANDING, LARRY! I'M STILL STANDING, CAMILLE AND LAURIE, HELENA, AND WHOEVER ELSE CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF TRYING TO RUIN ME. the fact is, your son' your brother doesn't DESERVE ME, BITCH! Other Grievances Against Larry and his Hipocritical Family 1) What kind of Christians have room to judge me as unsuitable when one of their daughters have a daughter of her own out of wedlock? 2) What kind of Christians have room to judge me as unsuitable when their son is bringing weapons to school? 3) What kind of boyfriend spends 2 thousand on a guitar and not two dollars on a hot dog. Not to mention he couldn't pay for tuition at school and wants me to be sympathetic to him having to scrounge up money for that instead of treating me? Manage your damned money, you broke-ass loser! 4) What kind of guy won't kiss and show affection to me? TO ME? I'm fucking beautiful! I THINK THAT LARRY IS GAY ANYWAY. HE'S TOO HOMOPHOBIC TO BE COMFORTABLE WITH HIS SEXUALITY. thank goodness we didn't have unprotected sex, or else I would have had AIDS. that's right, he wasn't screwing me is because he prolly daydreams about the same guys that I do! 5) How is your momma going to tell me who to marry when she is on her second husband herself? Let's see: she can't even call him by his first name and has to settle for "Mr' McGee" because his first name is LARRY, the name of her UNSUITABLE FIRST HUSBAND, and the name of her LOSER SON. 6) Why would a suitable guy refuse to go to the PROM with me? 7) What kind of broke-ass joke can't afford to attend a football game to to watch me perform? He had to wait outside until the end of the fourth quarter several times to pick me up, only so he could cock block any guys that would talk to me while saving five dollars. 8) He doesn't treat me like a fucking princess. 9) He doesn't like me weraring a wig when his momma owns TWO OF EM. 10) I could go on easily. I SO DON'T CARE IF I HURT HIS FEELINGS. I ONLY TOLD THE TRUTH! GOODBYE, LARRY. I TOLD YOU IT WOULD BE TOO SIMPLE TO GET OVER YOU. hope you and your family have had fun in ruining your life. i hope you don't turn gay like all of the signs are pointing to. have fun cutting NIGGAZ hair. hope none of them have AIDS and bleeds on you when you cut them with those crooked-ass lines to attempt to do. i'm ready to go to Hooters and talk to fine-ass guys who have plenty of time and interest for me, not to mention--real jobs and money.

-----------------------
now to add on to the list:
he let's his old hoodrat friends ruin my life. won't support me when i'm dealing with the police and lawyers about to lose my space on campus. tells the bitch that she can move in with him afterwards while me and him are still together. i confront him about it and he goes fishface. says that he wouldn't do it. does it anyway. bitch is sleeping in his bed with him today. larry still can't be a man for me, support me, defend me, or just even be there. and this little hood rat bitch gets all of his resources. well, his family should be proud. kareah is obviously so likable. she's a near felon and classless. i don't see how she's been a family babysitter for so long. i don't give a damn if she's funky, can play guitar, and dresses like a dyke. i thought that real men wanted REAL women. if larry is okay for settling for something that prolly has a bigger penis than he does, then it's all good. i have simply gone through way too much with larry over the past year. it's obviously not meant to be. him, his sorry family, and his sorry friends can go make a happy life with their righteous attitudes.

geez, i guess i can't do worse so here's to definitely looking up. thanks best friend and all of the other sensible friends out there who are helping me see through this. you were right: i should have never got back involved with him to begin with. good luck to any other girls who tries anything with him. maybe she'll be stupid and classless enough to enjoy the treatment--kind of like kareah!

another stupid guy.

you know i normally don't post actual names, but the REALLY STUPID ones have to be allowed for laughs when i need one later.

-------------------------------------

Lyrickz

Between You and Joey aka Lyrickz

Joey aka Lyrickz

Today at 1:10am

What it do,

I just launched my Facebook Muscian's Page, and i'd apprecite it for real if you could stop by and check it out. Ya know, listen to a few songs (if you havent already), become a fan if you like, and share the news with your friends/enemies/teachers/parole officers...real talk. I got a coupla potentially big things in the works and i want to include everyone who's interested in them.

Check it out sometime,
Lyrickz.

10-4

Lyrickz

Musician

68 fans - Become a Fan

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Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:12am

no.

This message is branched from a previous thread. Show thread historyHide thread history .

Joey aka Lyrickz

Today at 1:18am

...i expected that from you.
eh w/e

Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:20am

:)

Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:21am

then why even add me to the thread and then click submit?

Joey aka Lyrickz

Today at 1:22am

cause im in the rhythm. Im on the S's. I started not to, since you never respond to any mass message you happen to get from me, but i added you just in case tonite you were feeling especially good...

..guess you arent

Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:29am

since when do i have to be "extra good" to go looking at stuff that i'm not interested in? sorry you didn't know that i don't really care about all of that and didn't get the drift. i guess i should apologize because you assume what i care about and cant take a hint? im sure as hell NOT going to become a "fan" of someone just because they ask me to, especially if they were a friend first. that's for people to do out of blind adoration, which i don't have for you.

sorry?

Joey aka Lyrickz

Today at 1:35am

You're wrong...

See the MAJORITY of my fb friends ARE familar with my music (most VERY familiar), so they already know what the deal is. You think i'd even find 60 som'n people willing to go thru the trouble of adding a application to their already-clutterd profile simply because a nobody asked them to? BE FOR REAL MA.
As far as cant take a hint, people only take what you give them. Last time i checked, i didnt read minds, ma...sorry.
Whether YOU become a "fan" or not is not really a big issue. After all, if you cant tell, that message is entirely copied and pasted and wasnt constructed SOLELY for the purpose of luring YOU in. Frankly i couldnt care less being that all it took was two clicks to add you to that thread anyway...no big loses over here.

blind adoration...thats cute

10-4

Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:43am

you be for real.
so i apologize again for not being one of your best buddies and caring?
i still dont see where i'm wrong... i just see that if you didn't expect me to click, then you shouldn't have wasted your two seconds to add me to your copy and paste message and waste both of our time, right? dont get pissed when i tell you how i feel about you cluttering my inbox. simple and makes sense, right?
im not any of your "ma" by the way buddy. oh wait, i'm not even your buddy cuz i dont care about your music. its obviously a crime. take me to jail for not being a groupie to some unoriginal idea?

bye! i'll block you from contacting me now and you can tell all of your friends how big of a bitch i am and i can tell all of mine how smart you are. how is THAT for not a big loss? i think that i actually win!!! yay!!! ♥♥♥

Joey aka Lyrickz

Today at 1:49am

The mind is capable of rationalizaton to the highest degree of irrationality, i tell ya. If that sensless reply makes you feel you won, then who am i to take away your "joy".

Frankly no cares about you not liking my music, im sure more than a few dont....most just arent little bitches about it. But you seem to already know that about yourself, and i found out you cant do anything to a bitch who knows she's a bitch. So w/e...i'll be that.

You're not my "ma"...? C'mon MA, thats the classic, suburban, corny observation. As i said before....BE FOR REAL.

And if you have a problem receiving the one or two messages a year i send you,then delete me. Trust me, i wont be crying myself to sleep tonight over it.

BIG LOSS.
WOW.

Cherry Shonté

Today at 1:58am

well PA, or whatever:
yeah, it really is. go pound your chest for agreeing that i'm a bitch. such a big loss for me too! go take your suburban lingo and "music" to people who care and arent little bitches about it now.

i'll delete this message like i did with your others and put you on my block list now like i do with all the other wastes of my time.

again, so sorry about your obviously bad or underthought decision to bother someone who is obviously uninterested [only if you're smart enough]. i'm such a bad person and this all such a HORRIBLE loss to me, i assure you [so says a future author and physician]!!!!

oh, boo me darling!
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and now his status is for me to be taken off of his penis. who's more wrong? me for possibly being a bitch, or this guy who is all out of substance and has to resort to a sexual war. oooh, a penis! i'm scared and offended out of my mind at his ignorance!!! why would i ever have his probably AIDS-stricken member when there are so many better ones out there? ones that are on men with DEGREES and culture [not to mention real careers along with their art]?

larry really sucks, simply.

i'm so through with larry and trying to accommodate his ways by sacrificing my own comfort.. that isn't to say that i've ever expected him to be perfect, or that i'm even a perfect person on my own. hell, i've cheated on him before--more than once. and this reason that i've ended now, he's fucked up in the same way more than once [in the past couple of months, even]. he's just so awful. he can't be a man in any way except when it comes to telling me to respect him [while he's doing bitchy stuff like talking to kareah and trying to bring the bitch back home so she can ruin his life there]. i'm so outdone by his behavior... let's just say that i haven't abandoned him when it comes to his health and welbeing, or let my insane-ass sister with the bastard baby try to jump him because he's still in college [he's not, by the way], or let my mother put him out... i could go on, but the fact of the matter is that larry is a coward, cheap-o, immature, unfair, bitch specimen of the trashiest of men.

that's all.

he sucks for me.

i don't ask for jewelry. one engagement ring after three or four years of dating doesn't count. i don't ask for shopping sprees of fabulous. expensive clothing. my only vice is that i like good food, not at ritzy restaurants, but at [get this] Hooters!

he tells me he loves me. disses me in front of his friends before i have literally add two and two together for him to see. i told him how inappropriate it is for him to be visiting exes that he has screwed, almost kook-ups, and the like at midnight when i don't know about it. the bitch he visited even called him back and told him it wasn't cool because she was with her man. sounds proper. larry should have been somewhere where he belonged, with the woman he declared his love to.

now i've fucking broke up with him and he doesn't give a shit. he's gonna go get with some girl who doesn't want him, some bitch with loads of money who will buy him all of the fucking incense and Heineken beer that he wants. he'll never have to feed her or be a man for her.

fuck that.