my feel good revolution

this is what i'm currently and violently thankful for:

• my Wonder Woman mother
• my grandmother who reminds me of how great a tool prayer really is. i admire her for being able to just give me a scripture to read off of the top of her head.
• cheap used PS2 games and year-long warranties at GameStop
• peppermint tea
• Acetaminophen
• freshly shaved and sugar-scrubbed legs
• groceries [peppermint tea]!
• Kareah presently being with my ex "fiancé" Larry and having his baby. and while i'm at it, i'm pretty thankful for all of the rotten things his family and friend-turned-baby's mother put me through (like his big sister trying to kick my ass). this was not the life for me! the cancer has rudely been cut out, but it's out. i didn't need any of that obviously.
• having some campus cop randomly flirt with me and tell me that i look good
• good books and my friends who love them almost as much as i do
• the hope that comes with tomorrow
• THRIFT STORES!
• Pita Pit
• my fiddling manfriend whom i think hung the moon and makes magic with his eyes
• wet dreams starring comic book characters and the like that i get after i've been drinking
• Tori Amos' music touching my soul. that woman transcends so much.
• my family [living and not passed] which gets so much of my intense, hard love
• never being able to tell someone how much i truly love them because words can't encompass such. it gives me something to always aim for when i see them.
• eyeliner

Break's over :(

i feel remarkable. i'm so thankful that i have the resources and the strength to get out of bed, even when it feels like i'll never make it through the day. and then i laugh at all the other times that i've felt that way [this month even] as i work out and have some coffee. i feel remarkable.

my Spring Break was slightly uneventful, but i was immensely pleased. i got to argue with my family and eat Mom's cooking. i got to stare up into my boyfriend's face and meet more of his wonderful family. his sister read my feminist rant and hugged me for writing it. it was weird, but i enjoyed agreeing with someone. she's so great. i just can't post about her brother in lewd ways anymore. i'll just keep most of that in my head from now on. it was getting pretty bad; i felt like an 18 yr. old boy.

there was plenty of beer on Bourbon Street. there were also plenty of cabaret girls in their underwear. i ate overpriced crawfish when i could go back home and cook them myself for free. i ate beignets at the fake Café du Monde in Riverwalk Mall. i saw some folks who went to my university. i took a picture of some guy dressed as a jester and i named him Arlechino when his real name is prolly just Jake. my boyfriend fiddled and some woman cried after one of the songs. she had a boyfriend, but she apparently likes musicians a lot. i'm not jealous; i can't blame her!

i didn't see any vampires, but a musician friend of my second family lent me one of her vampire books to read. it's not Anne Rice, but it ain't awful. i'll give it back next time that they tour.

i'm back in Campus Town and i miss home only because i love home a little too much maybe. so it's not really a bad thing. i've got easy decisions to make and experiences to enjoy. i should shower and wash the dishes from breakfast. i should finish the love poem i'm writing and i should write another one to myself!


the Natchez steamer; credit to myself!

a shot of Decatur Street; credit to myself!

laissez-les bons temps mourir? nah.

Spring Break!!!

i'm ready to Spring Break myself all over. here's to a week of bliss: family, church, good food, good music, my significant other, New Orleans or the beach, fun, and other stuff that i might get myself into.

if you're from my home town, not Campus Town, you should head to Hal & Mal's to see my boyfriend and some other good musicians jam on Saturday night 3/14. it's gonna be great; i'm gonna LOOK great. you're not doing shit else anyway. support local music! you'll love it!

no comments. everyone have fun and be safe/smart! take pictures!

some feminism.

entertain me if you're brave enough.

1. why don't more men take their wives' last name when they marry? why do so many people find it necessary to take the other person's last name anyway? i'm almost certain that i'll keep mine. maybe.
2. why is a woman's issue, such as fertility control facing such a reduction of rights at the legislation of men? they don't even have ovaries, but they can tell me what to do with my body. i call bullshit. as special as our bodies are, we should have special allowances. we shouldn't be punished for being great! c'mon Constitution! women are people too! ladies, "We shall overcome!"
   
3. WalMart won't sell PlanB. thanks guys!
   
4. there is a huge birth control price hike going on. this is counterproductive.
   
5. lots [way too many] states have unconstitutional holds on abortion access. many of the state legislators are men. i wish dumb folks like the governor from my home state could temporarily be disenfranchised when it comes to things like this. his backwater, redneck, tobacco dipping ass.. men like him make me want to cry.
6. sex toys can't be sold in my home state?!! as extremely hard as it is for a lady to reach orgasm through sex, now she can't even get pleasure from herself? but strip clubs are okay. and crimes like sexual harassment, domestic violence, and rape aren't punished harshly enough if you ask me. women have become the prisoners and slaves of their own society.
   
7. men have a defunct genome, but they're superior enough to rule over themselves and women since when? seriously guys: be sensitive to a woman's issue or don't vote. go jump off of a bridge. all in favor of a female monarch after Obama finishes being sexy in office say "Aye!"
   
8. Dead Men Don't Rape. men=monsters. sounds very radical and hateful. they aren't my exact sentiment. BUT they have some disgusting basis. sad to admit it. how many men do you know carry pepper spray with them at night?
   
9. wait a minute. you want me to to get a chemical burn to make sure that my legs are hairless. you want me to wear bras, impractical little heels, and face paint [because i don't look good enough]. i have to suck in my stomach, douche my vagina full of poison because you can't handle the way a real woman smells, cover up my body because you can't keep your eyes in your head... sounds like the other sex has a bit more of a problem with ladies do than we do with ourselves. almost sounds like society hates us. it's their problem. they should date men. or fuck dolls. when did feminine become synonymous to impractical? why oh why?
10. my period doesn't make me unclean or scary. it's the most beautiful thing that my body can do. i don't need to douse myself in perfume and limit my activity because the world is afraid of the wonderful thing that my body does. i am the instrument of Creation [only when i choose to be]!
11. i'm lesbian because i'm making sense to you? where is your logic, dude?! actually i might go lesbian because idiots like you make me actually want to date another being as out-of-it's-mind as me. hell, we can share shoes.
12. stop saying "chicks, cougars, creatures, sweetheart, cunts, etc" stop naming your instruments and cars after women. stop naming hurricanes and tropical storms and such women's names. stop it right now.
    

------------------------------
Go do this now
i know i'm pretty radical. it's my job, or nearly is. i can't wait to be the greatest gynecologist, most vocal woman's rights activist, president of my state's chapter of NOW, author of several books, etc.. but you don't have to be. leave the hard stuff up to the professionals! here is what you can do:

1. go to Planned Parenthood website and see what you can do to support progress in your area. don't have a facility in your state? there's your need for progress right there!
2. go to the NARAL website and see how woman friendly your state rates up. it can't be any more disgusting than my own.. my History teacher gave me that website in high school after i emailed out a petition against the governor's action and mailed him a letter! i love ladies with sense! so cool! i still got a C in her class...
3. go to the NOW website. i love them and they're always looking for support AND they'll mail you some really sweet stickers for your car!
4. go watch the Vagina Monologues. seriously!
5. Rihanna [or however you spell this misguided girl's name] is crazy. this website is not.
6. go to Bust.com! have fun!
   
7. dress as Wonder Woman or Poison Ivy! they're hot ladies, they're strong, and they don't let a man tell them what to do! who would dare?!
   

--------------------------------------------
i am NOT a man-hating [or Republican-hating], natural-smelling, bitter, cat owning, PMSing, boot-wearing lesbian person. sorry if i seemed so. don't let me scare you off. i actually love men. i generally want to put things up their asses for my pleasure. many men are wonderful. my brothers, my uncles, my boyfriend and his dad and brothers are all beautiful men. men do so much for me, for this country. they are heroes at war. they are protectors, they are single parents. they are amazing lovers. they can be the most polite gentlemen and some of the most intelligent people i'll ever know, unless they happen to be the governor of a very damned, very Red, very backwards state. some of the raddest feminists are men and i thank them for their support. i do not believe that women are superior [even if we are pretty rad]. i support equal relations and respect among all human beings, no matter what gender or sex that they identify with. if you want to take issue with something i've posted, go ahead. it's healthy and i might have been a bit violent and obsessive. i just want everyone to recognize how amazing ladies are! i'll admit it--i'm not perfect! only very nearly so.

and then, of course, my Libra senses tell me to equally rant against the stupid, useless, disgusting women blighting the face of the earth. but that is another post that i will have just as much fun with.


YUCK, right?! thx, here.

i'm a gluttonous asshole.

i've come to the conclusion about how big of a fatass i am: i had a dream last night about my boyfriend--and a cheese fondue. no messy combination of the two either. i was having a fondue party and i didn't even touch my boyfriend at all. he was just in the area, twiddling his thumbs while i ate bread with cheese dripping off of it. i feel like such a gluttonous asshole!

[brag]
have you ever had your new love interest act protective of you in public? was it silly cute and lovely feeling? i have, and YES! i went out to Mugshots to hear him play one night and some drunk, overly friendly marine sat by me and kept hinting for me to come back on Wednesday when he would be there again. i was sweet to him [mistake] and he bought my next two rounds of drinks all while my manfriend was on stage. well, immediately after that set, my man comes out of nowhere, swoops me up in his arms, and says "Hey, Baby!" it was uncomfortable for me, but hilarious! the drunk marine should have taken the hint, but he never backed off. my guy introduced himself and had to eventually go back onstage. time for the marine to try some more tricks, right?

the marine told me that didn't trust musicians and he kept talking me down. he even wrote his cell number on his business card for me and i just kind of pushed it to the side in a half-assed acceptance. after the next set, my apparently untrustworthy significant other comes back to save me. he was a lot more aggressive this time. he got all loud and "joked" about fighting the marine. he told him to stop trying to recruit me or else some furniture would have to move. haha!!! but seriously though. it looked and sounded realistic; i had to grab his arms to get him to hush up a little. it didn't really work. got solicited to sit near some Australian men. got to dance with a groom-to-be at his wedding party. my boyfriend congratulated the guy and made an announcement to the bar about him sharing a dance with his "beautiful girlfriend." anyway. rode home more amused than drunk. there was a loud "Bye, Baby!" from the stage as i was leaving in a final act to stake claim on me.
[/end brag]

it snowed here recently. my car was all covered in the stuff. now it's hot as hell. i'm more broke than i have ever been in my life now. my car needs a tire. i drunk dialed the wrong "Kirsten" in my phone. i've been corrupting a girl whom i work with all weekend. there is a random 11 1/2 th Street here that i've just seen today. i have some free time now, so i'll prolly indulge in some TV, which i never get to do. what's good to watch besides old Sons of Anarchy and Rescue Me?


this is my frozen car outside of a friend's dorm. it's the one next to the handicap space.

[i had a photo of a nearly nude Charlie Hunnam here, but my photobucket denies it.]
this is completely tangent to anything i just posted. sorry. or am i?

sugar for sex; we played chess.

the title sums up my weekend in a rush. went home for some rehabilitation and tearful prayers and fried fish. i scraped a beguiling pathogen from the roof of my significant other's mouth and now my stomach is being violent like his was being a week ago. in my opinion, we all need a stomach virus to sit us down and remind us to pause, think, and wash our hands after using the toilet.

instead of blogging, i've been holding back vomit, been writing, been saying "Alleluia" with my grandmother and my aunt after medication. when is Spring Break? when did i fail at being fabulous?

no, i actually feel fine now. i really do. anytime i feel my depression taking a down cycle, i have my resources that i fall back on to keep me afloat and it's nice! not trying to preach to you here, but The Serenity Prayer is great to pray or just say to yourself. also, John 14 is honey.

i have to study, as always. surely when these cooties have run their course, i can get back to my senses. use Lysol! use soap! don't eat unwashed food or kiss your germy manfriend too deeply even if his eyes are blue!