the f-word and jokes!

i got pissed because my appointment just called me "sweetheart" at my job. silly boy. here are some rude jokes to make me laugh and feel better. not really feminist, just mean!

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: "I can do better than this" and he made woman.

"Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe."
-Jackie Mason 

Q: Why are all dumb blond jokes one liners?
A: So men can understand them.

Q: Why do men like BMWs?
A: They can spell it.

Q: Why do men name their penises?
A: Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 99% of their decisions.

Q: Why are men like noodles?
A: They are always in hot water . They lack taste. They need dough.  

alright. i feel better now. and i agree that these are mean! i don't really think like this [except for maybe the first one...]. honestly, if that guy knew me, "sweetheart" would be the last thing he thought about me! i'm a woman, but i'm only a "lady" when i can afford to be one. i'm strong. i'm a tart--a cherry tart.

bummy-ex update.

more for my own records than anything. no comments. after larry called, my father, uncles, boyfriend, brothers, guy friends, etc. would have LOVED to have the number that he called from to politely [yeah right] tell my destitute and sad ex that he had better NEVER pull that again--if he has an ounce of concern for himself.

well one of the above persons tried to. the number was disconnected. what a punk move! larry called me right before he knew he couldn't be reached back because he didn't want to deal with reality and consequences. explains why he said "aww!" right before the phone hung up. i knew that he was immature/a bitch/generally an inept man when we were dating. what a lovely man to have around. just not around me.

i hope that he never contacts me again. it's been a good, long time since i've had to even remember that he really existed.

i've cut out the cancer a long time ago. with him. with "friends" who don't understand the concept of being loyal or genuine. with enemies. i pray for and smile at all of my debtors, especially the ones who can't take the hint that they're not supposed to be in my life anymore. it's been doing me good so far!

everyone have a fabulous Friday! be brave and genuine. smile a lot. love the place where you are currently and don't waver--especially if it's rewarding you!

my ex? FML.

exaggerating. F his L. i was in a Benadryl coma and i didn't recognize the number calling me and i answered it. and i was stuck listening to him hoping that i was a big person. i am.

me: hello?
ex: you still with Cingular?
me: Andy?
ex: you still with Cingular?
me: who is this?
ex: your worst nightmare..
me: *cough, cough* ow, headache! who?
ex: it's Larry.
me: oh, heh. hi.
ex: i'm living with some bipolar roommates and i've never thought that it was a real condition until now. i want to apologize for giving you crap about your mental problems when we were dating.
me: i'm not bipolar.
ex: oh.
me: i have depression. you apologized to the wrong girl! sorry. anything else? where's Kareah?

anyway, he obviously still felt like talking to me and our conversation got really sad. it was haha funny, but seriously my heart was breaking for his life: he doesn't work. he has a baby on the way. he abuses pot. Kareah is in school when she's about to pop, i think. Kareah probably isn't all too innocent herself. happy or not, she's in a bad place with her "man." how irresponsible of a mother. his sister thought that he was on crack and sent him a random "I love you Larry" txt message out of concern. he's living like both a hobbit and a sardine at his new place. his family is ignoring the problem like a pink elephant in the room. he's a barber from home and visits drug abusers' institutions for $50 a visit to make around $200 for rent. he's given up his dreams of a music career. he doesn't want to keep his baby and would rather pay a daycare than babysit his own kid during his long, empty days. he doesn't have faith in love anymore, even if he's living with the woman that he impregnated.

he's so bad off right now. my heart breaks for him. what advice is there for him? what could he do? he's not any of my concern anymore, but i hope that somebody in this wide world of ours does care about him. it's just so sad to watch someone pursue what makes them happy and then crash in the end. that's what his life is--a big crash / wreck. and he's dragging Kareah and a baby into it too! this isn't nearly ideal, or even healthy.

i'm seriously so disgusted that i can't even be mad. i would usually smirk to myself and say to him:
i'f you're going to leave me, upgrade! your fault and too bad for you!
wonder if your parents are happy now!
i'm SO glad that i was condom-crazy! no crack babies for me!
haha!

but this has transcended what i feel, or even what he feels. it's an obvious problem and i'm so glad that i'm not sharing it with him. i still wonder why he really called me. that bipolar shit was crap. it's not my place anymore to be on the other end of the phone with him. wonder if his baby's momma [he hasn't married her] knows that he called me. he needs to find comfort in his new family. Kareah is his partner of choice. he's going to be a daddy. he's got to grow up. there is NO need for him to call me anymore. God bless him and his mess.

SO glad that this is over. doesn't he just look like a piece of shit waiting to happen? at least it's not happening to ME now.

marital rape is legal

assuming the worst, that is. i almost threw up when i read this article from the Bust magazine website. apparently, a married woman can't refuse sex from her husband if this bill is passed. how disgusting. if that country doesn't want the world to think that it's full of monkeys, then a bad job is being done of it. i could spit in the supporters' eyes. don't fuck with me and women's rights.

on a lighter note:

TGIF!!! i need a break! i've been pissing blood thanks to a sanitation issue, but i'm better. i drove an hour away to be with my manfriend for the weekend while he was performing. credit card statements will go back to my house stating "EconoLodge." how classy. i literally walked up onto a celebrity downtown there: i noticed some old guys flirting with me, so i asked them for a light for my Andy's cigar since they were talking to me. turns out, one of them is C. L. Blast [and here]. he introduced himself and showed me a picture of himself with Isaac Hayes from way back when they used to perform together. then i asked him to sign my program. it was great. he had forgotten what year it was and it was so cute.

after we left the hotel together, one of Andy's teachers said to him "I know that you're gonna play good today!" the jazz performances were great. yes, Andy does it all. him and his university sounded divine and jazz isn't even my cup of tea.

i need another break soon. i miss singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" with Andy in the van. i miss kicking someone in my sleep. i don't miss nearly killing everyone on I-20 on my drive there and back for that weekend.

tried to pull the pregnancy joke on my mom for April 1st. she cursed me the fuck out and and told me to buy a test to make sure. then she said that she was coming after me with a clothes hanger. shit. she got the joke and started laughing and apologized for calling me a skank-ass whore. she was SO angry! it was funny how Andy went from being her "favorite son-in-law" to "that sorry motherfucker" in two seconds. Daddy laughed and said that he would choke the shit out of him until he turned purple--and marriage? no one is taking his daughter unless they're employed, have a house, two cars, and are damned near running for Congress first!

oh boy.


me and C.L. Blast and his signature both taken with my Pantech C150.

some feminism.

entertain me if you're brave enough.

1. why don't more men take their wives' last name when they marry? why do so many people find it necessary to take the other person's last name anyway? i'm almost certain that i'll keep mine. maybe.
2. why is a woman's issue, such as fertility control facing such a reduction of rights at the legislation of men? they don't even have ovaries, but they can tell me what to do with my body. i call bullshit. as special as our bodies are, we should have special allowances. we shouldn't be punished for being great! c'mon Constitution! women are people too! ladies, "We shall overcome!"
   
3. WalMart won't sell PlanB. thanks guys!
   
4. there is a huge birth control price hike going on. this is counterproductive.
   
5. lots [way too many] states have unconstitutional holds on abortion access. many of the state legislators are men. i wish dumb folks like the governor from my home state could temporarily be disenfranchised when it comes to things like this. his backwater, redneck, tobacco dipping ass.. men like him make me want to cry.
6. sex toys can't be sold in my home state?!! as extremely hard as it is for a lady to reach orgasm through sex, now she can't even get pleasure from herself? but strip clubs are okay. and crimes like sexual harassment, domestic violence, and rape aren't punished harshly enough if you ask me. women have become the prisoners and slaves of their own society.
   
7. men have a defunct genome, but they're superior enough to rule over themselves and women since when? seriously guys: be sensitive to a woman's issue or don't vote. go jump off of a bridge. all in favor of a female monarch after Obama finishes being sexy in office say "Aye!"
   
8. Dead Men Don't Rape. men=monsters. sounds very radical and hateful. they aren't my exact sentiment. BUT they have some disgusting basis. sad to admit it. how many men do you know carry pepper spray with them at night?
   
9. wait a minute. you want me to to get a chemical burn to make sure that my legs are hairless. you want me to wear bras, impractical little heels, and face paint [because i don't look good enough]. i have to suck in my stomach, douche my vagina full of poison because you can't handle the way a real woman smells, cover up my body because you can't keep your eyes in your head... sounds like the other sex has a bit more of a problem with ladies do than we do with ourselves. almost sounds like society hates us. it's their problem. they should date men. or fuck dolls. when did feminine become synonymous to impractical? why oh why?
10. my period doesn't make me unclean or scary. it's the most beautiful thing that my body can do. i don't need to douse myself in perfume and limit my activity because the world is afraid of the wonderful thing that my body does. i am the instrument of Creation [only when i choose to be]!
11. i'm lesbian because i'm making sense to you? where is your logic, dude?! actually i might go lesbian because idiots like you make me actually want to date another being as out-of-it's-mind as me. hell, we can share shoes.
12. stop saying "chicks, cougars, creatures, sweetheart, cunts, etc" stop naming your instruments and cars after women. stop naming hurricanes and tropical storms and such women's names. stop it right now.
    

------------------------------
Go do this now
i know i'm pretty radical. it's my job, or nearly is. i can't wait to be the greatest gynecologist, most vocal woman's rights activist, president of my state's chapter of NOW, author of several books, etc.. but you don't have to be. leave the hard stuff up to the professionals! here is what you can do:

1. go to Planned Parenthood website and see what you can do to support progress in your area. don't have a facility in your state? there's your need for progress right there!
2. go to the NARAL website and see how woman friendly your state rates up. it can't be any more disgusting than my own.. my History teacher gave me that website in high school after i emailed out a petition against the governor's action and mailed him a letter! i love ladies with sense! so cool! i still got a C in her class...
3. go to the NOW website. i love them and they're always looking for support AND they'll mail you some really sweet stickers for your car!
4. go watch the Vagina Monologues. seriously!
5. Rihanna [or however you spell this misguided girl's name] is crazy. this website is not.
6. go to Bust.com! have fun!
   
7. dress as Wonder Woman or Poison Ivy! they're hot ladies, they're strong, and they don't let a man tell them what to do! who would dare?!
   

--------------------------------------------
i am NOT a man-hating [or Republican-hating], natural-smelling, bitter, cat owning, PMSing, boot-wearing lesbian person. sorry if i seemed so. don't let me scare you off. i actually love men. i generally want to put things up their asses for my pleasure. many men are wonderful. my brothers, my uncles, my boyfriend and his dad and brothers are all beautiful men. men do so much for me, for this country. they are heroes at war. they are protectors, they are single parents. they are amazing lovers. they can be the most polite gentlemen and some of the most intelligent people i'll ever know, unless they happen to be the governor of a very damned, very Red, very backwards state. some of the raddest feminists are men and i thank them for their support. i do not believe that women are superior [even if we are pretty rad]. i support equal relations and respect among all human beings, no matter what gender or sex that they identify with. if you want to take issue with something i've posted, go ahead. it's healthy and i might have been a bit violent and obsessive. i just want everyone to recognize how amazing ladies are! i'll admit it--i'm not perfect! only very nearly so.

and then, of course, my Libra senses tell me to equally rant against the stupid, useless, disgusting women blighting the face of the earth. but that is another post that i will have just as much fun with.


YUCK, right?! thx, here.

i'm a gluttonous asshole.

i've come to the conclusion about how big of a fatass i am: i had a dream last night about my boyfriend--and a cheese fondue. no messy combination of the two either. i was having a fondue party and i didn't even touch my boyfriend at all. he was just in the area, twiddling his thumbs while i ate bread with cheese dripping off of it. i feel like such a gluttonous asshole!

[brag]
have you ever had your new love interest act protective of you in public? was it silly cute and lovely feeling? i have, and YES! i went out to Mugshots to hear him play one night and some drunk, overly friendly marine sat by me and kept hinting for me to come back on Wednesday when he would be there again. i was sweet to him [mistake] and he bought my next two rounds of drinks all while my manfriend was on stage. well, immediately after that set, my man comes out of nowhere, swoops me up in his arms, and says "Hey, Baby!" it was uncomfortable for me, but hilarious! the drunk marine should have taken the hint, but he never backed off. my guy introduced himself and had to eventually go back onstage. time for the marine to try some more tricks, right?

the marine told me that didn't trust musicians and he kept talking me down. he even wrote his cell number on his business card for me and i just kind of pushed it to the side in a half-assed acceptance. after the next set, my apparently untrustworthy significant other comes back to save me. he was a lot more aggressive this time. he got all loud and "joked" about fighting the marine. he told him to stop trying to recruit me or else some furniture would have to move. haha!!! but seriously though. it looked and sounded realistic; i had to grab his arms to get him to hush up a little. it didn't really work. got solicited to sit near some Australian men. got to dance with a groom-to-be at his wedding party. my boyfriend congratulated the guy and made an announcement to the bar about him sharing a dance with his "beautiful girlfriend." anyway. rode home more amused than drunk. there was a loud "Bye, Baby!" from the stage as i was leaving in a final act to stake claim on me.
[/end brag]

it snowed here recently. my car was all covered in the stuff. now it's hot as hell. i'm more broke than i have ever been in my life now. my car needs a tire. i drunk dialed the wrong "Kirsten" in my phone. i've been corrupting a girl whom i work with all weekend. there is a random 11 1/2 th Street here that i've just seen today. i have some free time now, so i'll prolly indulge in some TV, which i never get to do. what's good to watch besides old Sons of Anarchy and Rescue Me?


this is my frozen car outside of a friend's dorm. it's the one next to the handicap space.

[i had a photo of a nearly nude Charlie Hunnam here, but my photobucket denies it.]
this is completely tangent to anything i just posted. sorry. or am i?

actual V-Day.

i don't even effing care if you care or not, but i had the best Valentine's Day--ever!

• i dressed up like a hot pink whore and put on a glam wig because my own hair was way too tangled
• i bought my family some nice expensive gifts. they all think that they stink now, though.
  
• i bought andy some nice Very Sexy for Him from Vicky's Secret; i hope he doesn't think that i think that he's smelly. that stuff just smells wonderful!
• andy took me to see Coraline instead of Friday the 13th after he read a silly comment i made on my blog. he's great.
  
• andy made me dinner at his parents' house: there were dim lights, candles, a rose, wine, and jazz music. he even wore a little apron. he was so tired when he was done that he didn't eat much. i did! that stuff was good! [my white boyfriend cooked his black girlfriend fried chicken, lulz. it was 1) a salad with raspberry vinaigrette, candied walnuts, and grapes, 2) asparagus, 3) reverse fried rice with lemon and nutmeg, 4) and Italian breaded chicken cutlets with lemon zest in olive oil, not peanut oil. it was all very lemony tasting and yummy.]
  
• we went to his place with dessert.
  
• he played me a song on his violin. it's called something like "Her Laugh," or "Giggle." he explained the different transitions in the music and how they mirrored my essence. lovely.
  
• he gave me a cute card, a tee shirt with our hometown university on it so i can feel close to home out here, and a sweet cap that folks here have never seen before.
• the dessert happened to be a tin of homemade chocolate-covered strawberries. they were delicious! some of the chocolate froze to the paper, so he scraped it off and we fed it to each other with a spoon. this was fun.
  
• ...
  

okay, on other notes, i have weird visitors to my blog whom i probably know. someone from back home has been visiting from a casualty insurance company. someone else has been using Google Chrome to visit and my family is addicted to Firefox. also, someone has Vista, but all the folks from back home who read me that i know have XP or some other OS. i even have a few proxy visits. swweeet!.. i suppose i could just zoom in to the street addresses using my tracking server. maybe later. the Internet is great.

my exam is over. i killed it with an A i'm assuming. i have more next week :( my apartment is infested with ants now and the maintenance man had to move around all of the wine bottles to spray properly! bleh.

ciao! i feel sick from The Pill and tired from studying. nap time!

lovie-day weekend.

did YOU have an awesome weekend?

sorry for not commenting and hanging out like usual. i've been busy spending time with an amazing man and my family. i've been learning to bake, giving gifts, and talking on the phone. when i get back to Campus Town tomorrow, i'll be swamped with studying for the first part of the week [this is becoming regular and increasingly NOT FUN], so i'll ttyl!

cherry.

lovely milestones.

i don't feel like typing in an exaggerated and ornamented diction. i'm not putting on a show here; there's no need to.

i'm in a lovey dovey mood. i love this approaching, fluffy holiday designed to empty our pockets and brains. i've done both with a zombie grin on my face. me and andy have become the couple that folks vomit at, complete with love poems to each other and "i love you!" messages on FBook everyday. yuck!

Most Importantly I Love You

Like the Sun watches over and warms the earth, I love you
Like a flower grows it's whole life toward that sunlight, i love you
Like bees swarm to that beautiful flower, I love you
Like the bear climbs only to fight his way through an army of angry, buzzing, stinging bees for but a taste of that sweet life changing honey, I love you.

yeah. this one was a public one from him; hope he doesn't mind. i respect the privacy of those sweet, little drabbles reserved to my inbox--and there are many.

today, told one of my buddies who happens to frown on a few of the losers from my past more than i do to stop updating me about their sad, hypocritical "progress" [they must be making some now]. i told her to support the fact that i have a while ago given up actually caring and will chalk up any nonsense to... well, nonsense. my friend has been known to tell me: but, cherry! they're splicing desperation into "love!" she's wanted to be you and she admitted to emulating you! look how sad and funny things have turned out! there's no need for her to alert me of any updates, stay their friend online just to nose around, etc. those folks can do whatever moves them. it's what i do! i mean, hey--it's obvious that everything has worked out to my benefit. there's no need to parade it around. a satisfied giggle under my breath every now and then will more-than suffice. haha.. and those links are to articles @ galadarling.com, btw--i luff her! i'm currently reading one on how to make my desk more inspiring.

i'm going home on Thursday to spend time with some valuable folks and give them gifts this weekend. my Innamortato has made plans for us to play Monopoly during our Valentine's night and i really hope that he is kidding. seriously though: we're going to see the new Friday the 13th movie [i'd prefer Coraline] and have some dinner plans among other stuff, and a thimble better have nothing to do with it! unless...
i washed my hair with Sensual aromatherapy shampoo, my diet and working out is making me look sexy, sexy. i spent $25 on eight chic clothing items at the thrift store. two of my guy friends washed my car for the first time that it's been with me.i'm getting good at beer pong chess. my grades are superb: my orgo chem professor called me an overachiever.

rambling, i realize that one doesn't need a person to be in love with this time of year [other than their own, fabulous self that is!] there are surely plenty of things in each person's life that they can love--things with value and not just a price, or a penis.

thx, here.

tag!

all of you bitches who tagged me better effing read this or i will come visit you and make you eat something that i cooked.
-----------------------------------------
1.Each blogger must post these rules first.
2.Each blogger starts with 8 random facts/habits about themselves.
3.Blogger that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their 8 things.
4.At the end of your blog,you need to choose 8 people to get tagged and list their names.
5.Don't forget to leave them a comment, telling them that they've been tagged and to read your blog.
------------------------------------------
1) i start to sneeze when i get really aroused. honestly. weird, i know. if my door is locked and you hear me sneezing, just come back in 15 minutes because i'm more than likely busy.
2) my mom is sick and it breaks my heart that someone so good has to suffer. it makes me feel helpless and scared for myself. and then she calls me and jokes about me being a clueless skank and it's all better.
3) i have two cigarette burns: one on either hand.
4) i'm such a tense person that my shoulders are frozen in an "up" position. i have to pause and make myself relax them.
5) i don't think that i've ever been this happy [which is way sad in itself], but it pisses me off because i don't want it to be due to some man, no matter how wonderful he is.
6) i like cats more than most people. yes, even you.
7) i'm actually so smart that i have no common sense. i have no idea what directions are. i put my shoes on the wrong feet. i can't cook without giving someone food poisoning. i can't even remember to eat enough times a day to not feel faint and awful.
8) when i consider my past, i smile SO BIG. i get sad sometimes, but my life isn't sad, as in pathetic and hilarious! and i've just concluded: i don't have lots of friends because cheap folks don't flock to me to make their own lives feel more substantial. they can't because it doesn't work; i actually deserve respect. "friendship" is often synonymous to one person [the one who believes in the friendship] being a fool.

i'm not a dummy like that! i just don't know where i'm going when i get in my car!
------------------
and i'm not tagging folks because some of you already have been tagged multiple times like myself. let's just simplify it: whoever hasn't had a turn, it's your turn now. tag! you're it, bitch!

musics!

look at my boy man! this is him on the fiddle, or violin, or whatever you decide to call it. you should hear him play blues bass guitar or sing!.. swoon. he's my celebrity. established and NOT high. oh and the shit actually sounds good. [that was an immature low blow, but i'm done now. sorry, i can't help it. i don't feel good; my stomach is sick.] and commenting is turned off because i'm just bragging about being the luckiest girl! i apologize. i'll find something substantial to post with when i'm not about to leave for my study group.

ciao!

edited later this day @ 7:43 PM

i'm better and back, bitches!

my fever burning behind the eyes is gone. it was replaced by a cold last night. but i took what i'm almost certain was a sinus pill, and i'm A-OK today. i'm loving my new place. i feel all snooty and grown-up. it's a gated apartment complex and i have a fancy parking decal and a mailbox! i've got an address! part of the city now, and not just the school! me and T [my only roomie and also my besite which is very convenient] have decorated really cutely and trashed the place each weekend for "hanging out" with our friends who don't have a place suitable for entertaining like ours. there's a growing little chain of liquor bottles at the top of our cabinets like a trophy case. we have a Netflix subscription and have been watching season-after-season of SATC. i baked a cake in our new full kitchen with new appliances and marble counters. it's edible; i tried it!

school is back in full swing and all of my classes are depressing. my economics professor ends each class with a note about melting glaciers in 40 years. it makes me not want to have children and commit suicide before things get worse.

my man left for the Inauguration this morning. i'm proud of him and his school's orchestra: they get to play for the Chief Executive! here's a little note he left me this morning:

I am getting more excited about our trip the closer it gets. We got an unexpected check from the Alumni Association for our concert this morning. We will get to use the money for spending cash. I will now be able to afford to go to the official inaugural ball. We sounded great at rehearsal tonight. I am super excited. I may not have access to the internet while I'm up there. I will call you. I am looking forward to valentine's day. We will have to come up with a plan for something to do. I miss you and love you. I will call you when I get into the hotel tomorrow night. and I was joking about the cake. I'm proud of you. I'm sure it was amazing or at least edible.

aww, right?

and here's more positiveness when i really appreciate it these days:

• a clean apartment
• my new vibrator
• my man telling me that he feels like i'm the woman that he's supposed to be with!
• cheap, cute clothes to make me feel pretty
• my real hair which is way down my back now thanks to the weaving
• coffee that i made myself and the feeling of that five dollars still in my pockets
• Radiohead
• vintage hairdos that do not go out of style
• Hope. Change. Woman Love & Activism (yes, i'm a BIG one of those F-words!!!)

ciao!

2008 review via a silly survey

this little survey is all over the blogging world. use it to review your year!
------------------------------------------------------------
1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
get parking tickets :(

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
of course i didn't. i can't even remember them. mine for next year make more sense, such as to stay smoke-free and such.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
my best friend's sister!!! an October baby.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
my high school aged cousin did. on my birthday. yep.

5. What countries did you visit?
none yet! although parts of my hometown are starting to look a little foreign.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
peace of mind! and a wonderful, pretty man to look at and touch inappropriately. oh, wait..

7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
my birthday because of a very, unfortunate and heartbreaking event.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
being completely independent of my folks!

9. What was your biggest failure?
i honestly can't consider ANYTHING a failure. how sweet is that?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
i just recently had a terrible cold. my back hurts really, REALLY bad now, but i know exactly why ;)

11. What was the best thing you bought?
my apartment, duh.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
some Southern republicans. honestly. just yes. [/sarcasm]

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
aww, but i was already a bitch in question 12!

14. Where did most of your money go?
pitas with feta and hot sauce, index cards. that's it.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
some big nosed loser :)

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
anything Timbaland for a silly reason, but that entire album is burned into my brain now!

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder?
a helluva lot happier.

ii. thinner or fatter?
thinner, if it's even possible!!!

iii. richer or poorer?
poorer. this is a recession folks, and the tuition spike has been no joke. not to mention my eating habits.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
going out. not necessarily partying, but just experiencing life outside of the chemistry building.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
watching virals on Youtube. maybe.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
watching the kiddies go insane. taking photos. drinking. letting the "holiday spirit" take over me and my boyfriend in the dark!

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
yes, ma'am.

23. How many one-night stands?
eh, i haven't been the biggest fan of one-night-standing guys these days. i won't answer this question.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
SATC. hands down.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
nope. not at all. in fact, i most definitely "hate" less people.

26. What was the best book you read this year?
i haven't had much time to read for pleasure, but Blood and Gold by Anne Rice is pretty sweet.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
HIM perhaps. or Bon Jovi.

28. What did you want and get?
pink stuff!!! how can you go wrongly?!

29. What did you want and not get?
rich.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Dark Knight is a good answer, isn't it? why so serious?

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
i was 20. i went home and played with my little cousin who was turning 7 on the same day. i heard about my other cousin dying. i lost my mind and i drank a helluva lot at the state fair.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
an OhMiBod musically operated vibe.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
thrifty and chic. basic and sexy like french women!

34. What kept you sane?
i did, bitches!!! by reading, pilates class, and masturbation.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
seriously?

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Prop 8.

37. Who did you miss?
only people who deserve to be missed, and there aren't a lot of folks in my inner circle these days. it's great, though. i'm turning into a snooty bitch who doesn't like my time wasted by Jokes.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
this big, beautiful, tall, blonde man with pretty blue eyes and amazing kisses. him.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
it goes on.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way!"--Frank Sinatra in "My Way"

nursery pr0n!

haven't blogged in a while for reasons that should either fill you with envy or send you straight to Hell! just kidding about the Hell part.. maybe. i did have sex in a nursery about three times in one night, but this is scandalous and tacky at the most--not unforgivable. i'm really, really hoping that this is the case, that is.

'tis Xmas Eve which means increasingly less for me now that i'm getting older; i'm enjoying watching the kiddies have as much fun as i used to. all i want these days is some wine and the vague light that is my near future: having house parties at me and my bestie's apartment and more sex in less guilt-inducing places.

my uncle saw my ex boyfriend out someplace with some "ugly, skinny little girl" which was a random funny note of my night. everybody laughed at his story and then he threatened my current boyfriend with his rifles and his spades-playing skills. this means that he likes him. that's how we do it.

i could go on about how great it feels to have someone in my life who sees in me what i see in myself, but i'll spare everyone. i WILL say, however, that he changed my car tire out in the freezing cold when i had a flat. this is exactly what a real man is supposed to do, and i'm still trying to get used to it. everyone is pleased.
------------------
now:

• i've been Tagged, but i've lost the post of the person who tagged me!!! i apologize. it's a lot of fun when people can remember these things, though. it's a great way to get exposure and link exchanges. sorry i suck so bad! remind me, whoever took the time to tag me, and i will refuse to forget for next time! so, so sorry... my mind has been all over the place.

• and while i'm remembering things, i'm doing my friend Bruce a favor! he is greatness incarnate as a DJ and here is a link to some of that greatness. it's good stuff. has to be. now you have something to at least fill in some of your bored, idle time. you're welcome.
  

Happy Holidays again! did you see my cutie .gif [or maybe it's a .png] of Jack Skellngton in a Sandy Claws outfit a couple of posts back?! i'm broke and this is all i can afford to give anyone this year!

ciao.

do old bluesy men use roofies?

i've missed home so much. and now there's a super sexy someone here who makes it that much better. last night was hilarious:

he took me to some local venue for "Blue Monday" where all of these old folks in cowboy hats, fur, and jeri curls were out to listen to some good music. the stuff actually sounded good and i was enjoying myself in my little red dress.

my boy man was having a good time too, but some of the folks there who knew him basically pulled him up on stage to play Bass, which was cool--FOR HIM. i was in the back of the house with some guy who was easily twice my age. after a moment he asked me, "Is that man your husband?" i told him no. wrong answer, because the man told me that he's an artist and he wants to do my picture... weird. i know that i looked young--how sure was he that i was actually legal?! some men are very questionable.

so my mister comes back thankfully, and then guess what? everyone wants him to sing! i didn't mind it because i like his voice a lot, too. so he does and it was me back alone with the creeper. mr. creepy had gone and come back with two hot dogs. he said that he couldn't eat both of them in time for his performance and offers me one. i tell him no and i guess that he gets offended because he says "Your man ain't going to mind! There's nothing wrong with it!" well, i didn't accuse him of such. that's not creepy, AT ALL! a hot dog roofie incident is not the way i'm trying to go out.

and some random guy walked by greeting folks and stops at me and tells me that i'm absolutely beautiful, which was unexpected but tastefully done. relief, right? and then some man was watching me twist my hair up and told me to leave it down because it looked fine the way it was. i shouldn't have said thanks, because then he asked me how long i had been talking to my guy.. whatthecrap? i'm not even safe when i'm trying to get my hair from itching my neck? i'm never sitting back there again.

so my beau finally gets done singing and i kiss him and asked him did he see all of the unwanted attention i was receiving from onstage. he said yeah; guess it was amusing! i'm going to have to wear a bag over my head or something next time. wear my brothers' clothes, maybe?

yeah, i just thought that this was funny enough to share. can't wait until some ladies are a little too friendly with my mister [not that i could ever blame them; who can resist pretty blue eyes and blond hair?].

later!

what my vagina has to do with Xmas.

i. hate. finals. week.

happy stuff please:

well, for those who have not seen the Twitter update, i now have the boy [and a parking ticket]. we said it on Facebook, so it's SO serious, ha. he's really old-school charming and blah blah blah. we're supposedly going camping for vacation among other things and he reassured me of my safety from bears, hobo homicidal maniacs, AND Godzilla. i'm not used to all of his appropriateness [i'm waiting to figure out what's wrong with him]. but apparently, not treating a lady like a lady is just not his style, and i honestly can't ask for anything more right now. i canNOT wait until he can bend me over the table to teach me how to play pool. seriously. i suck at pool and there's no other way to lean. well, lucky me!

i got the apartment off campus that i wanted. my only roommate is my best girlfriend [score! i wouldn't have any other way]. it's a big, luxury 2 bed and 2 bath with washing/drying units inside. so i finally have the new, big girl place that i've been wanting. now who's going to move all of me and T's furniture all the way there? i'm going to take pics of our moving day. is there a such thing as too much pink stuff and red velvet when it comes to decorating? and everyone is invited to the house warming celebration: bring wine because we can never have enough!

here is my Xmas list:

• Ville Valo on toast
• my boyfriend [woah it's been a while since i could type that] on toast
• more than 24 hours in my days so more things can get done
• some specific civil rights  and due social respect for women
• a filled prescription for my antidepressants and birth control, woo!
• the new Prince of Persia game for PS3 and Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe
• an OhMiBod musical vibrator sex toy; feel the music seriously!
• new mineral makeup and some thrift store clothes
• Denis Leary
• to be around my family and enjoy loving those crazy fuckers

a lot of my list is vagina-related this year. hmm..

crush.

people my age can't even make Charm fall out of a cereal box.

well except for this guy. i went to high school with him but i've never talked to him, even if he was friends with my ex and even graduated with him, i think. or maybe not.  so it's been four years since i might have seen his [beautiful] face. so, he asked me to meet him for breakfast two nights after his performance and wants some future dates. i think that sushi and hearing a band play is what he would like to do next.

so: we have a chemistry, he's a damned good kisser, and i like the way he bit the inside of my elbow. he has such a pretty, pink mouth! it's SO nice actually being able to have a big deal kind of a crush on someone, especially when i wasn't even searching to have one; it's proof that i've moved on physically and sentimentally. 

i am really glad that i decided to support live, local music that night! he's good on the strings and i'm pretty sure that he's good at other stuff too. men who can dance might be just as pleasant during other activities!

ahh, i haven't been on a big girl date [with a worthy guy] in a while. but, hell: it's better than never being on one. and i haven't felt kisses this good... EVER, it seems. it's so nice feeling like a lady and actually being courted! he calls me ma'am and told me that he thinks that i hung the moon in the sky.

-------------------------

*ugh! i really hate to wax exclusively on guys, but this is just one of those posts. forgive me. this man brought it out in me. oops. and i'm not expecting anything colossall from him. i'm just mostly glad of the progress that i've made! who woulda thunk?

frenching and flirting.

"thanks" to all of you lovelies who actually read all of my absent rambles and entertain me with your compliments. know that you are responsible for making me smile from day to day! i'm leaving for home tomorrow with my mom and dad and i might not get around to being near a computer as often as i would like to [or i might. who knows?]. but don't you worry, i'll return full force after this short break.

and now for some blogging:

French Week was celebrated recently on my campus and i had a blast. a bunch of high school Francophiles Frenchers came to visit and to participate in our activities. i baked cupcakes [French Vanilla, oh la la] for fundraising and apparently the things were good; they sold out in two hours. yay! no one got food poisoning. that definitely would not be chic.

there was a French dinner at a swank restaurant just out of town and the whole French Club went. a very nice boy drove me and sat next to me.  he was very polite and tall ;)   the whole affair was nice. the president of the club complimented my dress. the food was exotic and delicious. the company was delightful because everyone was full of wine and fried cheese.  here are a few photos. there are a cute crimson shirt that says "Kiss me. I speak French," vanity shots of myself, and pretty displays of the meal. 

ciao! i'll be back soon for a possible Twilight review and to describe how i'm absolutely sure that my Literature professor now knows that i'm in love with him. i didn't giggle and blush at him about a subject completely tangent to the course material, at all.

Happy Thanksgiving! 

i'm off for home where some amazing folks are!

i want to slit my wrists!

nah, i'm being dramatic. i'm actually okay-- just a little tired and starving. i'm back after a week full of lose: i've been literally studying biology more often than sleeping, which takes a lot of effort for someone wh:o is as fatigue-prone as i am. "of course i'm good in bed; i can sleep for days!" haha.. but seriously, my chemistry professor is Satan. he went into a crazy tirade around the lecture hall pointing to random objects and associating them with obscure material: "This is made of blah blah blah! And this is made of something else that you can't even pronounce! Exam on Tuesday!"

i'm getting sick, but i wear so much makeup that it's undetectable until i sneeze three times in a row. i'm on a diet and my tummy looks nice. i've got some resistance bands hanging over the door just waiting to be used in my pilates routine. there's actually motivation to use them now that i've been over to visit Blair's blog. 

nothing terribly exciting is going on. i'm pumped about getting a place soon with one of my besties, T. it will be the two of us and then another girl. heh--hope it doesn't turn into an Audrina v. LC and Lo situation. yeah, i watched The Hills. so?..  :)

*sneeze*

oh, red lipstick mimics confidence apparently. i've been wearing it and a [beautiful Clark Kent-looking] guy that i haven't talked to in a while was mesmerized by my mouth. he's very conservative and doesn't do much flirting,  so i personally pulled a few tricks just for practice. later online, he told me that he really liked my perfume. how's that for not flirting? exciting! 

Twilight is tomorrow! i want to see it!

TiLT

and go visit Gala @ iCiNG! she's a doll. i can't keep her wonderful webspace to myself forever. this is my first TiLT [things i love thursday]! here i go!
---
•Google Reader, which lets me subscribe to all of my favorite RSS updated websites from one place [blogs, twitters, campus and world news, literature assignments]. Googleverse in general because it's so dynamic and efficient! hel-lo!
•freshly manicured claws, er nails. double points for red paint!
•actually having time to experience breakfast incarnate as waffles!!!! WAFFLES!!!
being an ex-smoker, duh.
•flirting with beautiful [but socially inept] nerds.
realizing that eliminating a space for negativity in my life is quite beneficial to the whole progress thing, afterall. who woulda thunk?
•The South-a woman was killed in LA after deciding that the Klan was not the place for her and attempting to escape.
•meeting up with my platonic girlfriend over her apartment to watch Tommy Gavin Denis Leary Rescue Me while we "study."
•my job which gives me an excuse to wear hot office wear from the thrift store while i read Anne Rice or do homework!
•did i say something about hot nerds already? what about nerds who are 6'3 of lean muscle. oh, same thing!
•watching Fight Club for what seems like the sixth time in a month thanks to G4.
•YouTube playlists to listen to while i get ready for in the mornings! yesterday i got dressed and applied makeup to H. I. M., Joy Division [the Donnie Darko Halloween party song], Billy Idol, and the Danzig. badass!
•uh, my face? :D