An Old Me.

clinical depression, an interracial engagement, feminism, general weirdness, and staying fabulous, or at the very least, functional, in this world. part manifesto / commentary, part social coping project to generate inspiration and positivity!

Jun 19, 2005

sweating like a whore in church.

X-rated, just the way ya'll like it!
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underage sex shouldn't be a sin.
swearing to my mother on my life that i wouldn't engage in sexual activity with antonio and then doing it the day after, however, is a sin.

i won't make this long and erotic like that borderline porn scene i posted last, sorry.

we were making out on his bed. his sister walked by and said, "Lock the door..." as she was passing to her room; we did, which was excuse enough for us to do what happened next. he asked me if it would be okay for him to remove my pants and i said yes. my shirt had been gone for ages by this time and he was near nude himself.

after several minutes of dry humping, antonio kept shaking his head and telling himself to calm down. he was fighting with his hands on the band of my panties, debating whether to remove my last article of clothing, or not. this was amusing.

instead of removing them, he stuck his fingers in my vagina; i believe it was three. he stuck them in as hard and deep as he could, which was a little uncomfortable, but became intensely wonderful. being the horny bitch that i am, i grabbed his arm and forced his hand deeper inside of me. antonio couldn't take it anymore at this time [i guess my moans had further aroused him], and i could feel him humping my knee. he whispered in my ear, "I want to be inside of you..."

i protested for a while; i wasn't comfortable with him seeing me completely nude. i said i wasn't ready, but just to be safe, he insisted on putting on a condom out of the pack that J.A. bought for me the day before, while she was out buying some for herself. i'm glad he did becaue about two seconds after that, he entered me.

it hurt like hell at first, of course. antonio didn't know what to do; i was the first virgin he had been with. to take my mind off of the intense pain, he kissed me. it worked and soon the pain turned into pleasure of the same measure. his penis is so long, it hit my cervix and bent, which was uncomfortable in a GREAT way. sexual positions that he tried with me to push his penis deeper, like putting my legs on his shoulders, were out, though! he said that he wanted to make me cum, but i told him i was just in too much pain and so he finished up.

he took the condom off and said that he wanted to save the wrapper, but i told him that i wanted it. the last thing he told me about that ordeal that day was that i should have no qualms about being naked in front of him; i was extremely pretty down there and most other girls look like deflated parachutes. i love him for that.
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can't wait 'till tuesday.

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